Hot dogs and Britney

Home Depot has the best hot dogs in LA. They have soft, flavorful buns not needing the substitutive sesame seed. The dog is plump, but the skin does not crunch when you bite through it with your teeth. The guy who sells them has eight teeth, but they're all very clean and bright and they have no ridges. His teeth almost look fake, but they're angled at 35 degrees from his face, so I know they're not. Mayo is not an option and that's fine, because Mayo only obfuscates the bad taste of a dry dog and burnt buns. The thin foil, cradled in the hand, makes the dog feel like it's your living robot-baby with organs inside of it. But you eat it. And it tastes like a rainbow of the cholesterol you don't have to care about because you're only 27. Mmmmmm.

Britney Spears had lunch at the Abbey Bar and Grill yesterday. With Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie. I don't really care about that stuff, but this is what I saw when I walked out the door of my office for coffee at 4 pm yesterday. Traffic, piled up for blocks. Children running around screaming. There was a fat lady with a buzz cut running through the street yelling "Never forget, Never forget" at the driver of an H2. There was a man rabidly shaking a parking meter next to a convertible Mercedes-Benz CLK63 while inserting a paper clip into it in order to retrieve Britney's quarter. And there were at least fifty cameras and tripods and paparazzi shoving each other and everyone else on the sidewalk in order to get their shot. I got some coffee and went back to work. I left around 7 and had a smoke in the park before I went to my car. Two paparazzi had stayed to enjoy the setting, and they set their cameras down so they could play on the swings for a little while.